When the Rules Change

Updated: Aug 19

Relationships and Friendships have been constantly evolving for me. Getting closer while other get more distant, and the pendulum swings like elastics things return back to that natural shape. Each have their own set of rules, their own set of boundaries which I actively explore and push. Some times too much. But push them nonetheless. During this evolution I start feeling more, the L bomb is used and well … the emotional roller coaster begins. Sometimes its fun and others you just want to get off.

During the time I used to process what I’m feeling. Is it really Love, I’m feeling? Can I love some one and still be their friends? All answer point yes! Only the rules have changed. Yes i Love, but how do I love? How does it apply? What is it colour? Does it have to change anything? Its not always so easy, a lot has to unravel before you can see it core. when you do, you get to understand the nature of that relationship. At least I have. I had to go through this process myself. More than a few times… with each, it gets easier. The hard part is how the other deals with it, or doesn’t. I have to wait a long time for some to it figure out. Expecting things not to have change, it will never change… I hate to disappoint, but it will… it has… and will continue to… The rules have already changed, they just don’t know it. I don’t know yet how they will react just yet. I’ve already moved on to the next challenge. I understand how i feel quite well. I understand and accept the consequences of what I do and don’t do. Some times the rules change for my own sanity. What was OK, isn’t anymore. Sometimes they change because we want to explore a possibility more. They change when its brand new, as we get to know each other They change… I am beginning to understand my own boundaries. That I have them… The line exists… There are so many questions I still do not yet know.Now that I discovered this about myself, How do I move forward? How do I communicate this? How do I navigate other's boundaries? How does that conversation start?

I pause and think about the teachings I've learned thus far.

  • Be Honest with them and yourself,

  • Learn from the mistakes of your past and how those experiences have impacted you and others around you.

  • Have the Courage to say what you need to say.

  • Mindfullness of your boundaries, and understanding others is an expression of Respect

  • Doing what you need for yourself is an expression of Love and your Truth.

  • Knowing where you stand... in itself is Humility

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